


Heart's Desire

by JWade



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-01
Updated: 2016-12-01
Packaged: 2018-09-03 14:45:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8717956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JWade/pseuds/JWade
Summary: Sam finds a spell in the bunker's library that will grant him a wish. But can a simple spell actually affect an archangel?





	1. Chapter 1

Sam paced in his room, trying to get that spell out of his head once again. It seemed that every time he turned around lately he was obsessing over it. It had been a month since he had been browsing the library and come across a book; Simple, but Dangerous Spells. He realized that he hadn’t read very much on spells and that sort of magic so thought it wouldn’t hurt to flip through it. It wasn’t like he was planning on casting any of the spells. He’d often wondered, since then, if there was a spell on the book itself, pushing people to cast something. He’d even tested the damn book, but even Cas couldn’t detect anything magical in it or any magical influences on Sam. He supposed it made sense. It wasn’t like he was itching to cast all the spells in the book. It was just that one. Heart’s Desire. 

Sam huffed as he left his room and headed for the library. There had to be a reason that spell was listed as dangerous. If he could just figure out what that reason was, he would be able to talk himself out of it and put all this ridiculousness behind him. He was sure of it. That train of thought led him to looking up the ingredients of the spell, the procedure, and anything else he could find about it, but it seemed that at least one part of the book title was right. It was a very simple spell, no hidden agenda, no volatile ingredients. There was a bit of a moral issue…at least for what he wanted…but then he doubted that what he wanted would even work. Trapping an archangel with such a simple spell was highly unlikely to ever work. 

Given the fact that he could find no danger, and the fact that it probably wouldn’t even work, Sam decided to just do the damn spell and get it out of his system and maybe he would manage to get a decent night’s sleep again. He quickly copied the spell into his notebook and headed down to the ingredient storage to collect the ingredients. If he didn’t do this before Dean got back he would never get it done and it would haunt him forever. As Sam dropped the final match to light the basin and complete the spell, he found himself holding his breath and waiting for he didn’t know what, but it wouldn’t have mattered because nothing happened anyway. He sighed sadly, and cleaned up the mess, heading back upstairs just as Dean came stumbling in. He bid his brother goodnight and headed to bed before his drunk brother could ask any questions, if he had even noticed anything off. 

 

Gabriel saw the spell coming a mile away and swatted it away much like one would swat a gnat, but not before reading it’s intent and origin. So Sam wanted him to love him huh? That was interesting. Gabriel couldn’t help but wonder why. He didn’t dare hope that it was genuine. He knew better than that. He’d been taunted with the promise of love before and it was cruelly ripped away from him. He’d learned his lessons well. Perhaps Sam just thought it would be nice to have an archangel at his beck and call and this seemed like an easy way to do it. Maybe he just wanted to have a little fun, do a little experimenting, etcetera. Or maybe this was a setup for some elaborate punishment. Gabriel had no idea, but he was torn on whether or not he wanted to play along. 

On one hand, his curiosity was his greatest downfall, and not knowing what Sam was playing at would drive him crazy. The only way to know that would be to let things play out. On the other hand, there were his own feelings for the hunter to consider. He would be playing with fire and he wasn’t sure if he could keep from getting burned. Then again, it might just be the closest he could ever get to everything he’d ever dreamed of. Could he really just walk away from a perfect opportunity? In the end, Gabriel decided that he’d never been one to play it safe and let his curiosity win out as he found himself standing next to Sam as the hunter was climbing into bed. 

 

“G-Gabriel! Wh-What are you doing here?” Sam asked as he turned and pressed his back against the wall. He couldn’t help the concurrent hope and dread in him that Gabriel was here because of the spell. 

Gabriel forced a smirk off his face and twisted it into a warm smile that felt very out of place as he stepped forward into Sam’s personal space. “Because I love you, Sammykins. I can’t fight it anymore. I can’t keep hiding from it,” he said softly, nearly pressed up against the hunter as he reached a hand up to brush a strand of hair out of Sam’s face. 

Sam could feel his heart nearly beating out of his chest. It had worked. It had actually worked. He couldn’t believe it. He pushed away his guilt at taking Gabriel’s choices away. He would release him soon enough and it wasn’t like he was intending to sleep with Gabriel like this. He just wanted…he wasn’t sure exactly what he wanted, but he couldn’t keep himself from leaning down and kissing Gabriel softly. The archangel hummed contentedly and buried his hands in Sam’s soft hair, closing the little remaining distance between them and Sam’s arms wrapped tightly around Gabriel’s back, gaining confidence as he kissed him desperately. It wasn’t until Sam felt the erection pressing against his own and Gabriel’s hands fumbling with the buttons on his shirt that he knew he had to put a stop to this before it got out of hand. “W-Wait,” he said breathlessly wrenching himself away and trying to get himself under control. “I…I think…we should take things slow,” Sam said. 

Gabriel too was trying to get his own body under control, at least he had been until Sam spoke. His words were just as effective as a cold shower. When Sam had kissed him, he had allowed, just for a moment, to actually think there might be something there, but Sam had just proven him wrong. Sam obviously had some kind of agenda, and that agenda had nothing to do with sleeping with Gabriel. Apparently that was a line he wasn’t willing to cross. Gabriel took another step back and willed the hurt from his eyes as he said, “Right. Of course. It’s late. I should let you get some rest.”

“Wait,” Sam said quickly before Gabriel could disappear. “Maybe you could…I don’t know…lay down with me?” he asked hopefully.

Gabriel fought the urge to raise an eyebrow curiously. Was it nightmares then? Is that why he wanted Gabriel, so the archangel could soothe his nightmares while he slept? Instead Gabriel just grinned happily and hopped on the bed, curling up to Sam’s side when the hunter climbed in. He missed the blissful smile on Sam’s face as the hunter wrapped his arms around the smaller archangel and leaned his cheek against Gabriel’s head, breathing in the scent of peppermint and ocean breeze that was all Gabriel. Sam quickly drifted off to sleep, smile still on his face. 

Gabriel lay there, trying not to think about how perfectly he fit in Sam’s arms. Trying not to get attached to what he knew was just a game. He was failing miserably. Despite knowing that it wasn’t real, that it wouldn’t last, Gabriel couldn’t help but revel in his chance to have something he never dreamed he could. Sam. When he felt Sam starting to stir the next morning, he tensed for a moment trying to decide whether he should leave or not, before realizing that Sam had cast the spell. It wouldn’t be out of character with the spell for him to have stayed. He wouldn’t want to leave Sam’s side until Sam asked him to. 

Sam started for a second when he realized he wasn’t alone in bed and then the previous night’s events came rushing back. He once again smothered that little voice of his conscience, and turned with a smile and kissed Gabriel softly. Gabriel kissed him back just as sweetly and when Sam broke the kiss, Gabriel started to get out of bed only to be stopped by Sam’s arms tightening around him. “Can we just…stay for a little bit?” Sam asked hopefully. He knew he would have to let Gabriel go soon, both from the bed and from the spell, but he just wanted a little more. He wanted to experience this for a little while first. 

It took a minute for Gabriel to puzzle things out, but then he realized that Sam probably didn’t want to roam the bunker with him and have to answer questions from his brother. He wondered how long Sam was planning to hide or if he was just trying to put off the inevitable. Or maybe this would be a short game. Either way, Gabriel was still determined to play along.


	2. Chapter 2

“Okay, how about breakfast in bed then?” Gabriel asked cheerfully as he snapped his fingers and a nice breakfast spread appeared in front of Sam. 

Sam grinned and tightened his arm around Gabriel and turned to nuzzle the archangel’s neck. “That’s perfect,” he whispered as he pressed a kiss to the soft skin there before pressing another one to Gabriel’s lips. “Perfect way to start the day.”

While outwardly, Gabriel had shown nothing except complete relaxation, over the course of breakfast he found himself inwardly relaxing too and that scared him. Sam was acting like an attentive lover and he couldn’t make sense of it. Sam kept reaching over and touching him, brushing a hair out of his eyes or touching his cheek. He stopped every so often to kiss Gabriel softly or feed him some of his fruit. Sam hadn’t even asked for anything. Hadn’t let on at all about what he might want out of this and that hope that Gabriel had been keeping ruthlessly smothered started to gain a little ground. Maybe this was real. Gabriel fought it though. It wasn’t real. It couldn’t be. If Sam really loved him then he would never have cast that spell. He wouldn’t want it like that. Still, Gabriel reveled in the attention and responded in kind and it was only partly in an effort to play along. 

Once Sam was full, there was obviously still a lot more food there. Gabriel had never really understood the concept of moderation. Sam grinned as he got an idea and scooped up some whipped cream with his finger and slopped it on Gabriel’s nose. Gabriel looked at him and raised an eyebrow curiously only to see the challenging grin on Sam’s face that was soon echoed on Gabriel’s. This would be fun. Gabriel snapped up a pie and then smashed it into Sam’s face. Sam blinked for a moment in surprise. He hadn’t been expecting that, but okay. Two could play that game. Sam grabbed the syrup and squirted it at Gabriel even as he rolled off the side of the bed laughing. He knew that Gabriel could clean up any mess that resulted from all this so he wasn’t worried about messing up his bed. 

The food fight didn’t last very long and was ended by a bucket full of pudding dumping on Sam’s head, but they were both breathless from laughter by the time it was over. Once Sam had cried uncle he looked around the room. “Don’t suppose you could do something about the mess?” he asked hopefully. 

“Why you started it, dear Samsquatch, don’t you think you should be the one to clean it up?” Gabriel said sweetly. Sam’s eyes widened as he took in the extent of the mess covering the bed, the floors, the walls, and even the ceiling. Gabriel just let out a barking laugh and snapped his fingers, dousing the whole room with water, Sam included, but keeping himself miraculously dry, though still clean and the rest of the room was clean now too, just wet. 

Sam looked around in shock before he laughed. “Yeah okay. That works,” he said pulling Gabriel close and kissing him deeply. The room would dry and he could always blame any mildew on Gabriel to make him get rid of it if it came up. Sam had been hoping to get Gabriel wet too by pulling him against him, but the archangel stayed stubbornly dry causing Sam to roll his eyes good-naturedly. He’d still gotten a kiss so he wasn’t exactly complaining. Sam pulled back and looked Gabriel in the eyes and he could see the love shining in them that he knew was reflected in his own eyes and pulled him in for another passionate kiss. This time when he had to break for air, he just rested his forehead against Gabriel’s with his eyes still closed. He could feel the archangel’s warmth in his arms, feel Gabriel’s breath against his lips, smell the sweet peppermint and ocean breeze scent that he had always associated with the archangel. “God, I love you,” he whispered reverently, almost inaudibly. 

Gabriel forced himself not to react to that, but couldn’t find any words so he just leaned forward and pressed his lips against the hunter’s once more. He knew better than to believe that. Especially given the current situation, but he couldn’t let on without ending the charade. He could almost convince himself that it was more about his curiosity than not wanting to give this up. Almost. 

When the kiss ended, Sam smiled, with just a hint of sadness that quickly disappeared as he said, “Well I’m gonna go dry off and change, then maybe we can go hang out in the rest of the place?”

Gabriel just snapped his fingers and Sam was dry and dressed. He was surprised that Sam wanted to let him out of the room. He could sense Dean out there, so apparently Sam was good with telling Dean about them. He was pretty sure that Dean had no idea about the spell. Dean’s hatred of such things was practically as legendary as the man himself. Not to mention Dean couldn’t act well enough to fool Gabriel. Sam…Sam was good, and Gabriel often found himself off balance with the younger hunter, but Dean was transparent. At least to Gabriel. 

As they walked down the hall, Sam wrapped his arm around Gabriel, pulling him close to his side and Gabriel resisted the urge to roll his eyes as he moved his arm around Sam’s lower back. When they ran into Dean, the older hunter stopped dead in his tracks, looked them both over, blinked a few times and said, “Well…um…that’s new.”

Sam smiled softly. “Yep. Very new,” he said cheerfully turning to press a kiss to the archangel’s temple. 

“Uh-huh,” Dean said narrowing his eyes slightly at Gabriel. “Can I talk to you for a minute?” he asked the archangel. 

“Dean…” Sam said warningly and was cut off by the stern look Dean sent him. His brother obviously wasn’t going to take no for an answer and Sam sighed wearily. 

“Don’t worry, Sammykins,” Gabriel chuckled. “It’s not like he’s gonna scare me away or something.” He turned to Dean. “Lead the way.”

Gabriel followed Dean into the kitchen and the hunter turned to face him. “Can you make sure Sam doesn’t listen in?” 

Gabriel snapped his fingers. “Done,” Gabriel said with a raised eyebrow. There were a hundred ways this could go and he had no idea which to expect from the man in front of him. 

“Are you serious about this?” Dean asked evenly. 

“Come again?” Gabriel asked confused. 

Dean knew he would have to change tactics here, and had no problems airing his brother’s secret if it would save him some heartache. “Look, I know you’re an asshole, but I also know you have a heart in there somewhere too, so I’m going to tell you something. Sam is in love with you. He’s been in love with you for years. I think he kinda gave up after we found out you were an archangel. You know how he is, but if this is just a game or a way to pass the time for you, I’m asking you to please end it now before he gets in any deeper.”

“So wait…you’re saying he was in love with me before all that mess with the apocalypse?” Gabriel asked incredulously, not sure what to believe anymore. 

“I suspected after Mystery Spot, but I was sure when we found the hulk size hole and the candy wrappers. I could see it in his eyes when his face lit up and he started going on about wanting to talk to you,” Dean admitted. He needed Gabriel to understand this. He had a feeling that losing Gabriel later on would destroy Sam. It would be bad enough now. 

“So he’s never actually told you that he loves me,” Gabriel guessed. 

“Of course not. But I’m not blind. I know my brother far better than he thinks. I see the way he looks at you on the rare occasions you come around. I see the way he reacts whenever you come up in conversation. I know he loves you so I’m asking you, please, don’t yank his chain on this.”

Gabriel didn’t know what to say or how to react to that, so he just settled for a quiet, “I won’t,” as he glanced back towards the living room where he knew Sam was waiting. He was getting more and more confused about all this and resisted the urge to snap about who was yanking who’s chain. Dean seemed to accept that assurance because he nodded and headed back out to the living room, and Gabriel followed him. 

Gabriel went over to Sam and the hunter pulled him down on the couch next to him, back leaning against Sam’s chest as Sam wrapped an arm around his stomach and the other came up to run through his hair, and he leaned forward to press a soft kiss to the back of Gabriel’s ear. “All good?” he whispered softly and Gabriel nodded slightly. 

Dean didn’t hear Sam’s question or notice Gabriel’s nod, and he rolled his eyes at their gratuitous displays of affection as he plopped down in the chair. He wasn’t about to let them run him out of the living room. “Movie?” he asked. 

“Good with me. Gabe?” Sam said. 

“Yeah. Movie’s good,” he said snuggling a little tighter to Sam’s side. At least the movie would be distracting enough to the hunters to allow him to wrap his head around things.


	3. Chapter 3

The movie went much the same way breakfast had, with Sam cuddling up with Gabriel, rubbing his thumb in circles over the archangel’s stomach, running his hand through Gabriel’s hair, nuzzling against his neck. Gabriel came to the conclusion that he would just relax and let things play out. He would stop looking for ulterior motives everywhere, but he would still keep his eyes open if they popped up. He would never believe that Sam could truly love him and still try to trap him with a spell. 

After the movie, they had lunch and then Sam turned to Gabriel, “You wanna take a walk?” he asked. Gabriel just shrugged and agreed so Sam led them outside and they walked around town, down to the park, and stopped for dinner at a nice restaurant. Sam had been intending to pay, despite the fact that he could hardly afford it, but Gabriel beat him to the punch. The whole afternoon had been spent talking and laughing, with little stolen kisses interspersed. They had stopped to feed the ducks in the park, disappeared around the back of a tree for a quick makeout session, gotten ice cream cones that they shared. It was the perfect day, and the romantic dinner was the perfect end to it. 

After dinner, they started walking back towards the bunker in the moonlight, but then Sam abruptly changed directions and started heading back to the park, stopping in the center of the almost deserted open grassy area. “I was thinking maybe you could snap up a blanket or something and we could lay back and watch the stars for a little while?” 

Gabriel grinned and did as he was asked they lay down next to each other, Gabriel’s head resting on Sam’s shoulder as they both just enjoyed the moment. “Do you want me to tell you about them?” Gabriel asked after a few minutes. 

“I would love that,” Sam whispered tightening his arm around the archangel. Gabriel began talking about the different stars, pointing them out, and even talking about their creation, weaving it into grand stories, rather than just bland facts. Despite that, Sam still found himself lulled to sleep by Gabriel’s velvety voice. Once the archangel noticed that Sam had fallen asleep, he snapped his fingers and transferred them to Sam’s bed, propping himself up on his elbow and running a hand through the hunter’s hair as he slept on, oblivious to the change in location. 

The days and weeks followed similarly. Sam was just trying to soak up as much as he could of Gabriel before he had to give him up and he wasn’t sure how much longer it would be. There had been more than once that things had nearly gotten out of hand, but Sam wasn’t about to cross that line. Nothing sexual would happen while Gabriel was under the influence of a spell. He had started taking longer showers, usually while Gabriel was occupied with Dean and wouldn’t notice how long he was taking. 

Gabriel did notice though, and didn’t begrudge Sam his long showers. He just wished he had the same luxury. As an archangel, he didn’t have the excuse to get some time alone, and the fact that Sam showered when Dean was there to keep Gabriel occupied kept the archangel from dealing with his own tension. Finally Gabriel had enough. He waited until Sam was asleep and propped himself up on his elbow, running a hand gently across the hunter’s forehead to make sure he didn’t wake up, reached into his shorts, and started rubbing himself. It had been two weeks…two weeks of constant touching and kissing and teasing…and it didn’t take long at all for him to be achingly hard. He ran his eyes over Sam’s body, relaxed in sleep, as his hand stroked his hard cock. He may not be willing to touch Sam when he was unaware, but he could definitely look. 

As he started working harder and faster over his length, he couldn’t resist a little participation from Sam. He reached over and took Sam’s hand and rested it high on his thigh, just under the bottom of his shorts. It was no higher than Sam had touched him many times before, though there were usually pants in the way, and not near close enough to touch his cock. He knew he was dancing dangerously close to the line, but he had never really been one for denying himself the things he wanted. He wanted Sam, but Sam, for some reason, didn’t want him. He could have this little bit though. He started stroking harder and faster, trying desperately to get himself off before he couldn’t resist taking things even further. Sam’s hand resting on his thigh was enough to push him over the edge though and he came over his hand with a low groan of relief. Gabriel snapped his fingers and cleaned himself up, moved Sam’s hand back to his hip where it had been before and curled up to the hunter’s side to enjoy his presence until morning. 

It was another week before Gabriel decided it was time to start pushing things. Not with the intention of getting Sam to sleep with him, not that he would be unhappy if that happened, but with the intention of getting Sam to tell him why he wouldn’t. He was actually starting to believe that maybe Sam did love him and he needed to end this charade, one way or another, before he got in too deep to save himself. If Sam wasn’t sleeping with him because he didn’t want him then at least he would know. If it was because of this spell thing, then they could clear all that up, but either way something had to give. 

That night as they lay in bed, kissing each other, Gabriel’s hand trailed down Sam’s stomach towards his noticeable erection, but Sam’s hand caught his wrist before it made it there. “Oh come on, Sam-mykins,” Gabriel stumbled a bit over the name as he did from time to time. It was getting harder and harder not to call Sam by the nickname that existed only in his fantasies. Something he wasn’t going to give up for this. “You obviously want me. What’s the problem?” 

Sam sighed heavily and wrenched himself out of the bed, running a hand through his hair as he paced. It was time. Breaking the spell was simple. He just had to give up what he had wished for. He had to dump Gabriel. He wanted him to understand first though. He wanted to explain. He had no illusions that he would ever get another chance. Gabriel would leave and never come back. “I have to tell you something,” he started nervously. “A few months ago, I found this book in the library. Simple, but Dangerous Spells, it was called. I flipped through it out of curiosity and I found this spell. I still don’t know why it was considered dangerous but…”

Gabriel interrupted him with both an answer to his question and confirmation that he already knew. “Because humans rarely know what they really want and their ‘heart’s desire’ has a tendency to go very wrong.”

Sam just nodded at the information and opened his mouth to keep explaining before it dawned on him that Gabriel had just given him a very specific answer to a spell that Sam hadn’t mentioned yet and he stopped dead in his tracks and snapped his head around to look at Gabriel wide-eyed with alarm. “You…you know…” he whispered in dread. 

“Of course I know. You really think a simple spell like that could hold an archangel? That’s almost insulting. I neutralized it before it ever even got close. I just want to know why.”

“So what? All this these last few weeks was just you playing along? This is just some game to you?” Sam asked sadly, not quite managing to get mad. He had been the one who tried to trap Gabriel with a spell, so getting mad about it would be beyond hypocritical. 

“I believe I asked you a question first,” Gabriel said firmly, crossing his arms and refusing to dignify Sam’s questions with a response before he got his own answer. 

Sam sighed and looked away, unable to stomach looking at Gabriel when he admitted what he knew he had to. “Because I love you Gabriel. More than life. And I just…I just wanted to see what it could be like…with you. I just…needed to pretend…just for a little while.”

“How can you say you love me while admitting that you tried to trap me against my will? How is that love?”

“I know. I…that’s why I wouldn’t sleep with you. A little kissing and cuddling is one thing, but I couldn’t…couldn’t take advantage of you like that. Any more than I already had. I…I never planned on letting it go on for long. I just…wanted a taste. I’m sorry,” Sam said hanging his head to hide the few tears that were escaping. 

Gabriel could almost feel his heart melting at the sight of Sam’s not so well hidden tears, and the anguish he could hear in the hunter’s voice. He stood up and walked over to Sam, lifting the hunter’s head to look at him. “Let me make one thing clear. If you had slept with me, thinking I was under that spell, I would be out of here like a shot and never look back…”

Sam’s eyes widened again. Was he understanding correctly? “You mean…”

Gabriel just barreled on. “I don’t like what you tried to do, but since you didn’t take it too far and came clean, I’m willing to try and put it all behind us and start over.”

“You mean…you…you want…”

“I never lied to you, Sammy. I do love you. Always have. Maybe next time you could just say something about what you want instead of casting stupid spells hmm?” Gabriel said with a nervous half-smile as he waited for Sam’s response. 

Gabriel didn’t have to wait long before Sam crashed his lips into the archangel’s and this time when Gabriel backed him up to the bed and they tumbled into it, Sam didn’t stop Gabriel from completely ravishing him. When the archangel curled up to his normal position at Sam’s side afterwards, Sam grinned happily, and whispered, “I love you, Gabriel. Always.”

“And I love you, my Samshine,” Gabriel whispered back, finally giving up the nickname that he had always used in his fantasies, now that they were actually a reality.


End file.
